its been a week

And in my mind it feels like it never happened. Maybe I just don't want to believe it, who knows. But last night I watched the video by myself, gosh its hard. I can still hear her voice joking around with me about some ugly boots we saw. Which reminds me I need to go back to Belk to see if they got my mugs in yet, considering they were ordered in April, and we fussed at them again in August, I think we should have some by now. In one of the pictures she had a tissue in her hand, she always had a tissue in her pocket. Nanny also told me on my 21st birthday that it was time for me to start using Pond's Cold Cream. Her aunt uses it and doesn't look her age at all, and ya know since my 21st birthday I have used it every day, cause Nanny said so. She cut veggies with a steak knife, I picked on her and said she should use a real knife, it wasn't that she didn't have big fancy knives like I love...she just preferred the dangerous way, tediously slicing onions for her spaghetti that she had to make if Laura, Michael, or Chris were at their house. The one constant thing in life is Nanny's spaghetti, it has tasted exactly the same for as long as I can remember, mine taste different every time I make it. She learned to play the piano in her fifties solely to learn Fur Elise. She was a librarian for 28 years and could tell you just about anything about any book. But to me she was just Nanny, I don't know if she knew just how much I admired her. But considering she knew all sorts of other things that I couldn't figure out how she knew I am guessing she probably knew how we all felt about her. I can't even list things that I would want in grandparents because I have all of it, they genuinely care about us and everything we are up to.

Monday everyone was talking about Nanny's mother Granny Rose. She died when I was four(I think) but I remember a few things from going to her house and when she came to the camp with us. But most of the things I know are stories. She always made banana pudding when people came over, but it was the worst banana pudding ever...somehow she made it runny. She had someone bring her snuff every week when she was in the nursing home, and accused the granddaughters of being lazy because she didn't have great grandchildren...while one of them was pregnant. Her son's swear that when my Nanny and Aunt Billie moved out and got married they nearly starved to death from the lack of good cooking. From the looks of it I come from a long line of spunky women who were all quirky and interesting. I hope that when I have kids and grandkids that they find me to be just as spunky and interesting as everyone else in the family. I hope that one day I have a girl that I can tell about the miracle of cold cream, and how to tie a scarf.

It is weird how typing up all of my thoughts seems to be helping with this. But I am gonna miss her trying to make me line dance, I always tried but I couldn't keep up. Those ladies at the Shrine will give you a run for your money.And that photo down below, its our last and most recent professional family photo where we are all together. Nanny is standing next to me by the way. And our dress hunt for her dress was so funny, we tried on so many dresses and finally bought one that I loved...then she went home and exchanged it for the one she loved that she found in her size, but aren't Nanny and her sister(in the lavender) so stylish and pretty. Nothing about those two and their attitudes says a day over thirty, or grandma for that matter... just fun spunky women that I love to death.


{photo courtesy jenniferlizenbyphoto.com}