Overwhelmed.
How do you deal with it? Are you one of those who happen to thrive in pressure, or are you like me and it manifests itself in other ways. Like annoyance, irritation, or a need to find a tiny dark closet and hide in it with your iPad until the storm (
literally Tropical Storm Lee) passes?
I don't thrive. I never have. At least at this stage of the game I am not covered in hives and having a panic attack (
Thank you high school geometry). If there is too much going on at once I just get irritated, annoyed, and depending on who I am talking to...louder. I can't say at the age of 25 that I "can't help it", because if I honestly wanted to, but I can say that I don't care to help it. Hence the loud voice yesterday afternoon after a massive case of "I can't control this situation one iota" that led to me apologizing to a bunch of short people, if you get my drift.
Now let me digress. It was not like last year's "off the handle" version of "I can't take this anymore!" It was simply a very honest case of not having a single break due to our lovely friend TP Lee and other extenuating circumstances. Yes, this teacher has to have that 45 minutes of silence during planning to regroup and get things done so that your's truly can teach at 100% for my last two classes.
Oh, the incident. Anyway. I didn't yell (
I don't have the guts to with these open window paneling things above my room and allow noise to escape like air from a popped ballon) I just got stern, and my high pitched Southern-Valley accent got deep y'all. Deep. Mrs. B don't get deep until she means business. With that several little 8 year old eyes popped out of their pretty little heads with a look of "she hadn't done that before" and an obvious "Thank God it's not directed at me" look on their faces. I felt bad, but homegirl had to get stern to make a point.
So at the end of the day I apologized. I don't have to be the mean teacher I was last year, and I refuse to be. I told them I was sorry I got angry, but that things just had to be done a certain way. But let's face it, it was Friday after 2pm, we had finished testing and were writing. Nothing stresses kids out in the state of Louisiana at the 4th or 8th grade level quite like a teacher pulling out a released test items packet and discussing what components need to be in a written composition. Poor babies, it is just too much.
On a side note: I am very thankful for my partner teacher this year. She is amazing, absolutely amazing. When I was literally sinking from all the paperwork at the beginning she helped me organize, and now I feel like the work part of work is under control. She is also great to talk to and has great advice. I honestly couldn't be happier, reminds me of my first year teaching again!
Back to the story.
So after the stressful day/week. I left to go home. The weather was picking up. Jeremy was at the church working on something. And lastly, one half of the in-laws were at my house. (
yes my house that I have not cleaned all week because this week has been nuts and busy nearly every night) I got halfway home and just couldn't drive any further. This week had been to much. I was in no mood what-so-ever to put on a happy face and schmooze with house guests. Which led me to immediately U-Turn and windup here:
Yes I admit it! I don't see a shrink, I see Target. Throughout my college life, and up to now, if I am stressed out I go to Target for retail therapy. I walked up and down every asile. I even browsed cleaning supplies. I had to get away, and nothing de-stresses me quite like shopping. I magaged to snag some Essie Cute as a Button and some new red felt tip pens. Just in case you have young kids or teach, Target has several classic stories written in kid friendly terms in their dollar bin, I snagged Rip Van Winkle, Frankenstein, Dr. Jekyll & Mr. Hyde, and something else that has skipped my mind.
Anyway, so now my toes are this color.
Which helped a little. However, I am still in tropical storm force sour puss mood. Jeremy's Mom and her new husband wanted to play board games last night, guess what your's truly did.
Yes, you guessed right! I told my husband "No, work was exhausting, I feel like crap, I am staying in bed!" Yes, I know I wasn't raised this way. but Southern Belle went out the window hours ago. I was raised to make lemonade and have a cute snack on the counter for people to munch on. Sorry Nanny and Mom, this Southern Belle was plum out of hospitality at 5pm on a Friday.
So among other things, the Southern Hospitality is out the window this weekend. We are under a flood watch and a TP Lee watch until Monday. There is hardly any bread or water left at the store. My grill in living in the house (yes I was outside in my polka dot rain boots dragging it in once gusts made it to 5mph lol). In addition to all that lovely, the dogs are refusing to potty in appropriate areas and the smell of what I do not love woke me up at a fascinating 3am. Which brings us to present time.
How many are left out there? Something tells me this long post cleared the room out.
Hello.
(echos back) Hello. Hello. Hello.
